Eric, I'm so glad to see your comments, here; for me, they've always been a way to orient myself, to gauge whether my own focus is too far wide, too high or too low, too close to the edge. To remind myself to pay even closer attention to whether what I'm thinking truly makes sense. Thank you, again.
That said, it's that question of attention that, for me, has been one of my chief pleasures in working with grapes for the years I've been doing it. In the American culture in which I grew up, and the time of that growing-up, the emphasis that was the focus of child-raising was THE RESULTS. There was NO real importance given to what it felt like to produce those results. And the RESULTS included not to teach one's children much, if anything, about paying attention to how ANYTHING felt, other than maybe physical pain, and "not hurting anyone's feelings."
When I say felt, here's what I mean:
When I walk into the vineyard, what do my eyes have to tell me about what the grape-growers have done with the vines I'm looking at? How do the vines look? Has the grower done a good job? Do the vines look healthy? How much moisture is in the soil? When the vines bloom, what's the weather? Is there mildew? Is there space to permit good airflow? And so on, right to the point of ripening, and the decision of when to pick, and the picking itself.
I had to teach myself all of that, every step. The first year of Edmunds St John (1985) I didn't know how to do that, and I didn't know that I didn't know. I knew that I had a reasonably keen palate, and somehow, knowing that gave me some courage, and I knew that I would need that courage.
In the late Spring of 1985, I stumbled onto a connection to an almost legendary vineyard on Mt Veeder, roughly 380 meters above the Napa Valley floor, an old, dry-farmed vineyard that had, of all things, about a couple of tons of Mourvedre from 60+ year-old vines. The farming was entirely by hand, organic, and meticulous. The growers were the brothers Chester and Richard Brandlin. Chester, at the time, was in his early 70s, Rich in his late 60s.
It was impossible not to notice, that year during harvest, that not even the best of any of the other grapes with which I worked that year, were anything like those Mourvèdre grapes. That impression began when I first visited the vineyard, and met Chester and Rich. All the other growers I'd talked to had been eager to sell their fruit, because the market for Syrah, and for Grenache in California had not yet really come into existence, and the grapes had been planted as a kind of speculation, because someone had convinced the grower that, as for the market, "if you build it, they will come." The Brandlins' father, whose name has escaped me, at the moment, had planted Mataro (Mourvedre) because Gallo wanted some, and they were the biggest wine producer in California, as I believe they still are. Gallo would buy anything they planted.
But by 1985 Gallo had not even begun to make the Brandlin's exceptional work in the vines worth the effort required, and Chester and Richard wanted to sell the grapes to someone else, on the sly. (The Mourvedre they grew represented only 6 or 7% of the grapes they grew, and the effect on Gallo’s bottom line was statistically undetectable) But to Chester and Rich, I was quite a curiosity, because I was young, I suppose, and because I actually believed the Mourvedre grape could make beautiful wine, and because I didn't seem to care that there was no market in California for wine made from these grapes. My feeling was that if the grapes could produce a sufficiently compelling wine, a wine that was a thrill to taste, who could resist?
in 1985 those Mourvedre grapes taught me how to make wine, and it was because of how they felt to my feet and lower legs when I slowly crushed them with the weight of my body, how they smelled as they began to ferment, how alive the wine was! How, each time I smelled and tasted the wine, I could feel the nerves that transmitted information between my nose, and my brain come alive? That's not anything my culture had taught me.
There was a question that haunted me, that first harvest, and for awhile afterward: What role had I really played, in the production of that wine? It stayed with me for years. But gradually, as I began to integrate the way that my endeavor had begun to unfold, and the feelings aroused in that process, the answer began to emerge in my mind; I had relinquished any thought of being in command of the production of wines from the grapes I would work with. The wine I bottled would be a collaboration: with the vines, with the growers, with the elements, with Fate.