Kay Bixler
Kay Bixler
I think it's the new Australian shiraz/cabernet blend that's sweeping the nation. Like a Molly Dookie.
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CWD: The End Is Near
- Thread starter Joe Perry
- Start date
I think it's the new Australian shiraz/cabernet blend that's sweeping the nation. Like a Molly Dookie.
U
Unknown
Guest
I can picture Joe Dressner on his death bed surrounded by friends and family. One hand reaches to the sky as he whispers, "Veni, vidi, vendetta..."
Kelly Eckel
Kelly Eckel
As far as I can see you've got a handful of killer wines. Also, I think Kim is on a moratorium.
U
Unknown
Guest
Joe Dressner passes away in the distant future. There is much sadness.
After drifting away into sleep, Joe awakes to find himself on a small cloud which is lifting him upwards. Immediately, he denotes that everyone else around him is on slightly larger clouds and makes a mental note to complain to... well, whoever is in charge of cloud distribution. This frustration is added to after he receives the Chicken a la King when he clearly ordered the Salmon and Potato Pie. Thankfully, the in-flight movie is Three Men and a Baby so Joe grudgingly eats the Chicken while guffawing at the antics of Steve Gutenberg and Tom Selleck trying to change a babys diaper.
After waiting for what seemed like hours, stuck behind Ricardo Montalban in the customs line (many shouts of "KHAN!!!" were heard from the back of the line), Joe approaches what looks like a gated community. At these pearly gates, which Joe finds more off-white, he sees all the deities and prophets of man. Realizing what this is, Joe immediately curses How did I get here? Dammit, Beuker, this is all. your. fault!
All the Gods, Angels, Holy men, Shaman and a few witch doctors, open their arms to Joe in welcome. Scowling, Joe sticks his finger in his ears and walks through the middle saying La-la-la, I cant hear you! La-la-la, I dont believe in you! Suddenly, Joe stops and turns upon seeing a familiar face. He peers keenly at someone who looks like a bearded Charlton Heston.
Are you Moses? he asks
Ye, Joseph, I welcome you to
Ah! Interrupts, Joe, as he thrusts a finger in the air
Are you Moses of the Great Neck Moseses?
Well, I am represe...
Jaccuse!
Pardon?
Vendetta!
I think you have me mistaken for someone else
Joe discards his cane and begins to hop up and down while screaming, Vendetta! Vendetta! Vendetta! and pointing at the "Planet of the Apes" star. The other Gods, Demigods, Spirit Animals and so forth begin to look at each other uncomfortably.
Suddenly fearful that someone will steal his expensive arthritis-easing scorched cherry cane, Joe bends over to collect it. So hunched, Vishnu plants his size 12 Converse on Joes rear end and sends him plummeting through the clouds. The Deities, Totem Animals, and a few witch doctors smile, and turn to welcome an awkwardly bowlegged Ricardo Montalban coming to the gates.
What happened to Joe? Well, Joe got what he always wanted. Reincarnated as a stomach virus, Joe spread from victim to victim, exacting vendettas on the lower intestine of people, and a few witch doctors, across the globe.
The End.
After drifting away into sleep, Joe awakes to find himself on a small cloud which is lifting him upwards. Immediately, he denotes that everyone else around him is on slightly larger clouds and makes a mental note to complain to... well, whoever is in charge of cloud distribution. This frustration is added to after he receives the Chicken a la King when he clearly ordered the Salmon and Potato Pie. Thankfully, the in-flight movie is Three Men and a Baby so Joe grudgingly eats the Chicken while guffawing at the antics of Steve Gutenberg and Tom Selleck trying to change a babys diaper.
After waiting for what seemed like hours, stuck behind Ricardo Montalban in the customs line (many shouts of "KHAN!!!" were heard from the back of the line), Joe approaches what looks like a gated community. At these pearly gates, which Joe finds more off-white, he sees all the deities and prophets of man. Realizing what this is, Joe immediately curses How did I get here? Dammit, Beuker, this is all. your. fault!
All the Gods, Angels, Holy men, Shaman and a few witch doctors, open their arms to Joe in welcome. Scowling, Joe sticks his finger in his ears and walks through the middle saying La-la-la, I cant hear you! La-la-la, I dont believe in you! Suddenly, Joe stops and turns upon seeing a familiar face. He peers keenly at someone who looks like a bearded Charlton Heston.
Are you Moses? he asks
Ye, Joseph, I welcome you to
Ah! Interrupts, Joe, as he thrusts a finger in the air
Are you Moses of the Great Neck Moseses?
Well, I am represe...
Jaccuse!
Pardon?
Vendetta!
I think you have me mistaken for someone else
Joe discards his cane and begins to hop up and down while screaming, Vendetta! Vendetta! Vendetta! and pointing at the "Planet of the Apes" star. The other Gods, Demigods, Spirit Animals and so forth begin to look at each other uncomfortably.
Suddenly fearful that someone will steal his expensive arthritis-easing scorched cherry cane, Joe bends over to collect it. So hunched, Vishnu plants his size 12 Converse on Joes rear end and sends him plummeting through the clouds. The Deities, Totem Animals, and a few witch doctors smile, and turn to welcome an awkwardly bowlegged Ricardo Montalban coming to the gates.
What happened to Joe? Well, Joe got what he always wanted. Reincarnated as a stomach virus, Joe spread from victim to victim, exacting vendettas on the lower intestine of people, and a few witch doctors, across the globe.
The End.
Joe Dressner
Joe Dressner
Joe:
Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
What is this all about anyhow?
Why don't you and Dressner take your personal peeves to private e-mail exchange and leave us all alone in peace.
Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
What is this all about anyhow?
Why don't you and Dressner take your personal peeves to private e-mail exchange and leave us all alone in peace.
U
Unknown
Guest
originally posted by Joe Dressner:
Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
You're welcome.
What is this all about anyhow?
A wine forum - well - by design a wine forum.
Why don't you and Dressner take your personal peeves to private e-mail exchange and leave us all alone in peace.
He'd never go for it. His alter-ego continuously makes digs at me in the middle of the night. I suspect lycanthropy.
Best,
Joe
Joe Dressner
Joe Dressner
I find Dressner has become far more reasonable since he has become involved with Prana-bindu training and the Weirding Way.
Why don't you give it a try?
Joe
Why don't you give it a try?
Joe
Charles Weiss
Charles Weiss
originally posted by Thor:
I have experienced shrinkage (i.e. no growth) and mightily so, for the first time in 8 years.
Welcome to marriage.
Watch out Joe, next thing is that your head gets big
U
Unknown
Guest
originally posted by Joe Dressner:
I find Dressner has become far more reasonable since he has become involved with Prana-bindu training and the Weirding Way.
Why don't you give it a try?
Joe
*Psscht* I have a Glaive, Cosmic Cube and a white paper bag full of Jelly Babies in my pocket. Why would I need the Weirding Way?
Fetch.
U
Unknown
Guest
originally posted by Charles Weiss:
originally posted by Thor:
I have experienced shrinkage (i.e. no growth) and mightily so, for the first time in 8 years.
Welcome to marriage.
Watch out Joe, next thing is that your head gets big
I'll have to get all new hats! And a bigger neck!
Joe Dressner
Joe Dressner
I think the weirding way would help you reconstitute your caller and your shrinkage problems.
As Farad'n Corrino says, "My mind affects my reality." A user of the Weirding Way has to know that the action he or she 'wants' to perform has already been performed. For example, to imagine oneself behind an opponent at the current moment in time; when trained well, this knowledge will place you at the spot desired.
Defeating shrinkage requires such discipline.
As Farad'n Corrino says, "My mind affects my reality." A user of the Weirding Way has to know that the action he or she 'wants' to perform has already been performed. For example, to imagine oneself behind an opponent at the current moment in time; when trained well, this knowledge will place you at the spot desired.
Defeating shrinkage requires such discipline.
U
Unknown
Guest
Am I the only one that sees only 'www' in the URL at the top of the thread??
Chris Coad
Chris Coad
Must be a browser problem. I see "http://www" very clearly.
U
Unknown
Guest
good point, Chris - I'll upload the most recent Firefox update to include http://
Damn computers!
Damn computers!
Chris Coad
Chris Coad
It's a very inclusive URL. Ever-so-slight additions take you all kinds of crazy places.
The Latin Liquidator
Manuel Camblor
originally posted by SFJoe:
Just as a guess, is it merely cellar exhibitionism? I hear there are whole areas of the www based on that. I could be misinterpreting all kinds of things.
I do believe it is aa sort of exhibitionism, Joe. Of course, it's a really screwed up psychopathology when the flasher wants us to appreciate exactly how small it is. Reason takes a nap and all sorts of funny little monsters emerge...