The Sickness

originally posted by Florida Jim:

A friend from the wine boards was a regular participant on the boards and just as wine crazy as Brad and me. He and I even partnered up to direct import a wine we liked.
One day, his wife and he had a long talk - the gist was that he was ignoring his children and his marriage and that he might want to consider the ramifications of that.
Shortly thereafter, he sold off his cellar, stopped coming to the wine boards and, to the best of my knowledge, left it all behind.
My point is simply this; both the 'sickness' and its 'cure' are a choice, whether one thinks it or not.
I'm not much for the all or nothing approach but I respect it - some choices being harder than others.

And I too, have the shin bruises to prove it.

Best, Jim
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I remember this. And you and I spoke about it years ago, when you were in town for dinner at Cafe Loup.

I've often thought of that decision. I think about it in terms of: the money I've spent on wine, and what it might have bought instead, or what if it had been invested elsewhere . . . Has the hobby been too consuming? Has it overshadowed other aspects of my life that should have been given more attention?

My recurring thought is that it comes down to balance. If one is paying too much attention to wine at the expense of family, for example, then a reconsideration of priorities may be in order.
 
"That decision..", being yours, which Jim mentioned originally? Just curious.

I agree about balance. I am as mad about art and making art as I am about wine, as I am about playing music, eating food and having fun. It's a madness (luckily) that my wife shares with me...most of the time. Too much interest in everything is just balance enough.
 
No, not my decision. Someone from the West Coast Wine Network, about ten years ago. He sold his cellar and gave up the wine hobby, cold turkey.
 
I think my cellar is a more stable place for holding money than the stock market or other investments. Not as overvalued as gold, if you can believe it.

I don't have a wife and may well be unmarriageable.
 
originally posted by Jonathan Loesberg:
originally posted by Tom Glasgow:
originally posted by Brad Widelock:
The SicknessAs I write this, I can see my wifes passport on the desk next to me. She is leaving today for eleven days in Croatia. Im not thinking about missing my spouse; Im thinking about the wines shes going to bring home. I wasnt always like this, but some years ago I was taken with the sickness, the sublimation of way too many things in pursuit of wine. If there is a cure, I dont want it. Im comfortable with who I am, and if I happen to inadvertently bore my guests with too much wine minutia or utter too many onomonopias while enjoying a glass of wine my wife kicks me in the shin as a reminder that not everyone is afflicted. A black and blue is a small price to pay for the joys of red and white.

Brad
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Fla. Jim offers sage advice and his advice might likely be echoed by Prof. Loesberg, but I think you should expand your horizons into the orange and the rose.
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How did you know that I regularly indulge in the sin of uxoriousness? Indeed I consider the concept of uxoriousness to be a priori absurd.
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I love it Jonathan when I have to look up words you use in the dictionary and also when you talk dirty.
 
I guess everyone has to find their own balance on this, but everytime I've thought about how much money I've spent on wine and what other things it could have been spent on, I end up quite pleased with what I've received from my interest in wine.

Sure, we could always cut expenses and have more extra money. But what kind of life is that. I could have a lot more 'extra' money if I didn't eat either. But where would that lead me!

Of course with my first child on the way, these calculations may soon change.

Oh well.
 
originally posted by VLM:
Actually
I think my cellar is a more stable place for holding money than the stock market or other investments. Not as overvalued as gold, if you can believe it.

I don't have a wife and may well be unmarriageable.
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test run for a personal ad?
 
originally posted by Rahsaan:
I guess everyone has to find their own balance on this, but everytime I've thought about how much money I've spent on wine and what other things it could have been spent on, I end up quite pleased with what I've received from my interest in wine.

Sure, we could always cut expenses and have more extra money. But what kind of life is that. I could have a lot more 'extra' money if I didn't eat either. But where would that lead me!

Of course with my first child on the way, these calculations may soon change.

Oh well.
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Wow, mozel tov!
 
In just about every area of life balance is key. My wife and I used to have "discussions" about wine, but have reached the point where it's clear that as long as the bills are paid, home improvements funded, retirement is planned for and we can have fun vacations the hobby doesn't financially matter.

We've made dear friends through this wine hobby, and I would never trade that for an upgrade in assisted living facility some years hence.
 
Not only that, but if you've made real good friends, several will come visit in the rundown assisted living facility AND bring some decent wine with them.
 
originally posted by Larry Stein:
originally posted by Rahsaan:

Of course with my first child on the way, these calculations may soon change.
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What, did you think you were gonna sneak that through? This is great news. Congrats!
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Thanks. I think I've mentioned it in other posts. But I guess your 'sickness' is not such that you follow all the threads here in recent weeks/months..

Good for you!
 
Congratulations, Rahsaan.

I thought this was a thread about spouses and wine. Money and wine is no contest. If it were about wine and children, I also might not congratulate Rahsaan on his choice, except that I am a deep believer in the value of other people having children since they fund my habit.
 
originally posted by Rahsaan:
I guess everyone has to find their own balance on this, but everytime I've thought about how much money I've spent on wine and what other things it could have been spent on, I end up quite pleased with what I've received from my interest in wine.

Sure, we could always cut expenses and have more extra money. But what kind of life is that. I could have a lot more 'extra' money if I didn't eat either. But where would that lead me!

Of course with my first child on the way, these calculations may soon change.

Oh well.
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Congrats, you will be poorer financially but you will be happier.
 
originally posted by Asher:

I remember this. And you and I spoke about it years ago, when you were in town for dinner at Cafe Loup.

I've often thought of that decision. I think about it in terms of: the money I've spent on wine, and what it might have bought instead, or what if it had been invested elsewhere . . . Has the hobby been too consuming? Has it overshadowed other aspects of my life that should have been given more attention?

My recurring thought is that it comes down to balance. If one is paying too much attention to wine at the expense of family, for example, then a reconsideration of priorities may be in order.
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Agreed.
Todd made a tough choice and one I am glad I didn't/don't have to make.
But he did it for all the right reasons and I do hope it worked out for him.
And as Rahsaan notes, kids are a pretty important factor in any such choice.
Best, Jim
 
I too remember that fellow's decision so many years ago. I hope it worked out for him too. Thinking of how much time I've spent on anything in life, I could be accused of many things. Too much wine, sure. But too much work (at times), too much sleep (six to eight hours every day...that's a lot of time!), maybe even too much family. I hunkered down pretty good when the kids started coming along. Of course, it's hard to dispute that anything's more important than family, so how could you spend too much time there? Some do, to the neglect of themselves and their marriages, then children grow and things can fall apart. As Asher says, it's all about balance, and I think that's true even with family. Obsess about it, but don't over-obsess.

So congratulations Rashaan. Parenting really is, as the cliche goes, one of the hardest but best things ever.

How do I achieve my balance? Here's one example:

Martin_press.jpg
 
originally posted by Vincent Fritzsche:
I too remember that fellow's decision so many years ago. I hope it worked out for him too. Thinking of how much time I've spent on anything in life, I could be accused of many things. Too much wine, sure. But too much work (at times), too much sleep (six to eight hours every day...that's a lot of time!), maybe even too much family. I hunkered down pretty good when the kids started coming along. Of course, it's hard to dispute that anything's more important than family, so how could you spend too much time there? Some do, to the neglect of themselves and their marriages, then children grow and things can fall apart. As Asher says, it's all about balance, and I think that's true even with family. Obsess about it, but don't over-obsess.

So congratulations Rashaan. Parenting really is, as the cliche goes, one of the hardest but best things ever.

How do I achieve my balance? Here's one example:

Martin_press.jpg
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Do you at least pay the kid minimum wage?
 
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