Why I love the MMWR

S

SFJoe

Joe Dougherty
I have a secret love. Well, it's not really a secret, but it's one that I fear I don't share with that many of my fellows. It's a government publication that I grew fond of when it was a weekly little paperback, but it now arrives by email. The CDC publishes it, and it's called Morbidity and Mortality Weekly Report. As the title implies, it's about stuff that can go wrong.  Sometimes very wrong.  But all in the most scientific and epidemiological mode of expression.  Every now and then something really special comes along, and I'd like to bring you this week's:

 Car surfing.
 
I used to car surf in high school. Of our crew, I set the speed record on I-83.

I mean, I really sometimes think I'm really dead and this is all some afterlife dream.

Thinking back on my teenage years leaves me wracked with guilt. I had loving attentive parents and I rewarded them with crazy, testosterone fueled risk-taking.

I'm sending my mother flowers tomorrow.

I'm a shithead.
 
Damn, Joe, I come here to escape this kind of thing.

At work they give the people who car surf the Darwin award.
 
I grew up on a farm with a half-mile driveway.

Being a lazy kid, I'd drive up to check the mail.

Being a crazy kid, I learned you can set the cruise control (limited to speeds above 23 MPH) while in reverse.
 
originally posted by Chris Coad:
I blame Quentin Tarantino.
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Mostly I blame him for making me sit through that thing. What was the name they had for it?

So Joe, you actually get a paper version of this thing delivered to your home? How much does it cost (if I may ask)?
 
originally posted by Arjun Mendiratta:
originally posted by Chris Coad:
I blame Quentin Tarantino.
Click to expand...

Mostly I blame him for making me sit through that thing. What was the name they had for it?

So Joe, you actually get a paper version of this thing delivered to your home? How much does it cost (if I may ask)?
Click to expand...
No, I get a free email. Many years ago, my employers subscribed to the hard copy, and I suppose there must be libraries that still do.

You, too, can get the email and learn of the wonders of resurgent measles, the dangers of running a gasoline generator too close to your hurricane-damaged house, the prevalence of syphilis, and so on. Closer to home, there was a piece about ATV injuries not that long ago. Nathan? How's the ATV treating you?
 
Thinking back on my teenage years leaves me wracked with guilt. I had loving attentive parents and I rewarded them with crazy, testosterone fueled risk-taking.
Click to expand...

Guess I better keep my daughter away from televised Arsenal matches?
 
originally posted by MarkS:

Guess I better keep my daughter away from televised Arsenal matches?
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That's a good idea on general principles anyway. While not quite as repellent as Man U, the Gunners come close... and that gaudy Emirates Stadium is enough to make me dislike them on its own

Mark Lipton
(Still fuming after a day in France approaching "M. Hulot's Holiday" in all too many ways -- We shoulda done lunch, Sharon)
 
originally posted by SFJoe:
Closer to home, there was a piece about ATV injuries not that long ago. Nathan? How's the ATV treating you?
Click to expand...

Being a shithead doesn't automatically make me a redneck, although the two are related.

Unless of course this is directed at an actual Nathan, not just someone you call Nathan.
 
originally posted by MLipton:
originally posted by MarkS:

Guess I better keep my daughter away from televised Arsenal matches?
Click to expand...

That's a good idea on general principles anyway. While not quite as repellent as Man U, the Gunners come close... and that gaudy Emirates Stadium is enough to make me dislike them on its own

Mark Lipton
(Still fuming after a day in France approaching "M. Hulot's Holiday" in all too many ways -- We shoulda done lunch, Sharon)
Click to expand...

Fuck Liverpool.

Arsenal are the only club that is financially solvent. When Liverpool and ManU get points deducted for being underwater, we'll be the only game in town.
 
originally posted by MarkS:
Thinking back on my teenage years leaves me wracked with guilt. I had loving attentive parents and I rewarded them with crazy, testosterone fueled risk-taking.
Click to expand...

Guess I better keep my daughter away from televised Arsenal matches?
Click to expand...

Only if you want her to smoke crack.
 
So Joe, you actually get a paper version of this thing delivered to your home? How much does it cost (if I may ask)?
Click to expand...

Paper went out in 2002, so it's only available thru an e-link now, according to our library records.
 
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