Indescribably weird...

originally posted by Saul Mutchnick:
Also if you're ordering the theft of Chablis, why would you want 2,500 bottles of Brocard, of all people?
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I've had a lot of very good Brocard Chablis. But the same question occurred to me, since he's not a high priced, renowned producer. And repeated thefts from the same producer is also strange. Maybe they just hit producers with modern accessible storage? (Hard to make a swift getaway lugging bottles up from medieval cellars.)
 
originally posted by Saul Mutchnick:
Also if you're ordering the theft of Chablis, why would you want 2,500 bottles of Brocard, of all people?
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Probably because they could steal it.

People don't steal from Target, Walmart, etc because they offer the finest products.
 
originally posted by Rahsaan:
originally posted by Saul Mutchnick:
Also if you're ordering the theft of Chablis, why would you want 2,500 bottles of Brocard, of all people?
Click to expand...

Probably because they could steal it.

People don't steal from Target, Walmart, etc because they offer the finest products.
Click to expand...
You need to rewrite that last sentence, unless you mean that people don't steal from Target and Walmart and that the reason they do not is that Target and Walmart offer the best products.
 
originally posted by Jonathan Loesberg:
originally posted by Rahsaan:
originally posted by Saul Mutchnick:
Also if you're ordering the theft of Chablis, why would you want 2,500 bottles of Brocard, of all people?
Click to expand...

Probably because they could steal it.

People don't steal from Target, Walmart, etc because they offer the finest products.
Click to expand...
You need to rewrite that last sentence, unless you mean that people don't steal from Target and Walmart and that the reason they do not is that Target and Walmart offer the best products.
Click to expand...

I could do that. But I have enough sentence wrangling on my other screens right now!
 
It's hard to imagine that after crashing their vehicle through the building and spending who knows how long loading up all the bottles that they weren't caught or even noticed. Is the place that remote?
 
originally posted by Kay Bixler:
It's hard to imagine that after crashing their vehicle through the building and spending who knows how long loading up all the bottles that they weren't caught or even noticed. Is the place that remote?
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600 bottles is a pallet, so I'm guessing the wine was sitting there all wrapped up and ready for transport. Hell, they could have just forklifted it onto the truck in a couple minutes.
 
originally posted by Jonathan Loesberg:
originally posted by Rahsaan:
People don't steal from Target, Walmart, etc because they offer the finest products.
Click to expand...
You need to rewrite that last sentence, unless you mean that people don't steal from Target and Walmart and that the reason they do not is that Target and Walmart offer the best products.
Click to expand...
He does not need to rewrite that last sentence. You need to read it again and provide appropriate emphasis to make it the beginning of the answer to the question, "Why do people steal from Target, Walmart, etc?"
 
originally posted by Jeff Grossman:
originally posted by Jonathan Loesberg:
originally posted by Rahsaan:
People don't steal from Target, Walmart, etc because they offer the finest products.
Click to expand...
You need to rewrite that last sentence, unless you mean that people don't steal from Target and Walmart and that the reason they do not is that Target and Walmart offer the best products.
Click to expand...
He does not need to rewrite that last sentence. You need to read it again and provide appropriate emphasis to make it the beginning of the answer to the question, "Why do people steal from Target, Walmart, etc?"
Click to expand...

Even with your context, the sentence remains, at best, ambivalent. I still think it will be more naturally read as I read it. And the fix is easy and clear: "the reason people steal from Target and Walmart is not the quality of their merchandise."
 
That's a lot of effort for a wine board.

And that's coming from someone who thought he was on the pedantic end of things. Getting frustrated will all sorts of annoying wine abbreviations and misspellings and such.
 
Yes, but I think you and I are getting annoyed at different things. Shorthand among people who know what the terms mean is fine. (But Bojo and Corton Charlie are high on my list - in fact it pains me to even put the letters together on my screen)
 
originally posted by Jonathan Loesberg:
Even with your context, the sentence remains, at best, ambivalent. I still think it will be more naturally read as I read it. And the fix is easy and clear: "the reason people steal from Target and Walmart is not the quality of their merchandise."
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Life is full of ambiguities. Surely there's room for one more.
 
Shakespeare's output would have been a fraction of its ultimate volume, had it first been subject to review and comment on this board. I suspect he might have gone so far as to throw the whole line of work up as a bad business.
 
There's a famous Ben Jonson line: "Shakespeare never blotted a word. Would that he had blotted a thousand." Both his admiration for his better in the first sentence, and his recognition that even Homer slept, were correct. In fact, if it's true that he never blotted a word, he'd be the only great author that that was true of. Just pick up an edition with variations of anyone past 1800. They revised for every new edition in their liftetimes. I can't tell you what a good copyeditor finds when you write a book. And should you write a book, you definitely want a good copyeditor.
 
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