Fernet & friends

Levi Dalton

Levi Dalton
[NEWS for Immediate Release]

The Grand and Noble Society of Fernet will soon be holding it's Distinguished annual Discourse on Amaro: A Bitter Symposium, in bustling New York City.

This year's Gala Benefit will feature a keynote address from Artie "Artichoke" MacLeigsh, entitled "Notions from the Past, Algorithms for the Future: Fernet and the Kaballah," as well as a special opening arrangement from the Nocino Boy's School Choir.

To commemorate the event, custom designed Where's Menta? picture books have been commisioned by the Society. They offer a special chance to play a fun game of mind challenge and recognition, as the goal becomes to pick out the bottle labeled "Menta" amongst a panoply picture of normal Fernet bottle shapes and labels! Waldo has nothing on this level of mirth and excitement!

On successive Saturdays, much amari will be opened and much joy will be had, starting this Saturday, September 26th, when the Noble Society will open

Amaro Cora (Piemonte)
Amaro Silvio Meletti (Marche)
Amaro Mio Lorenzo Inga (Piemonte) and perhaps also the My!
Amaro Ciociaro Paolucci (Lazio)
Amaro del Capo Caffo (Calabria)
Amaro Abano Girolamo Luxardo (Veneto)
Amaro Cynar (Lombardia)
Amaro Ramazzotti (Lombardia)
Amaro Quintessentia Nonino (Friuli)
Amaro Lucano Pasquale Vena & Figli (Basilicata)

in a side by side amaro-a-thon comparative tasting. The amaro event of the year will continue on Saturday, October 3rd, which will feature special guest Herb Greenleaf and

Amaro Siciliano Fratelli Averna (Sicilia)
Amaro Bassano Nardini (Veneto)
Amaro Jannamaro Jannapunch (Abruzzo)
Amaro S. Maria al Monte Nicola Vignale (Liguria)
Fernet Americano (Piemonte)
Fernet Menta Americano (Piemonte)
Fernet Girolamo Luxardo (Veneto)
Fernet Branca Fratelli Branca (Lombardia)
Fernet Menta Fratelli Branca (Lombardia)
Fernet Italia da Peloni (Lombardia)
as well as a special "Mystery" Fernet!

Then join the Society on Saturday, October 10th, for a special lecture series led by Prof. Maxmillian el Zucchero as he explicates the "Chinato Conundrum: A Dichotomy in Quinine" and presents

Moscato d'Asti Chinato Luli Mauro Vergano (Piemonte)
Americano Mauro Vergano Grignolino (Piemonte)
Nebbiolo Chinato Mauro Vergano (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato Giacomo Borgogno & Figli (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato Marcarini (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato Damilano (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato Roagna (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato G. D. Vajra (Piemonte)
Barolo Chinato G. Cappellano (Piemonte)

as well as a special encore presentation of

Nocino Russo (Campania)
Nocino Notte di S. Giovanni Aggazzotti (Emilia-Romagna)

As a member of the Society of Fernet, you are entitled to free all-access entry to this year's event. Conferences begin at 3:15pm each Saturday at THE WORLD FERNET EXHIBITION HALL, located at 45 Tudor City Place, NY, NY. You will be welcomed with a glass and a hearty "Fernet thee well!" from your fellows.

Do please bring something to share with the assembled (a book on the subject you have found, perhaps, or something amari that you don't see above, or a bottle of home brew centerbes, or, or ???).

All questions about this special Symposium should be directed to private message. Do please let the Symposium organizers know you are coming, and rsvp. Symposia should last about an hour. You might eat before you come, or you might, you know, end up pickled.

[END of Release]
 
Having attended both acts of this production while it was being workshopped, I can only recommend that everyone attend.
 
Just in:

Word comes today from Pat "China" Coelho, president of the Baltimore chapter Fernets, that some special Rosolio may in fact make an appearance at this year's event.

Specific details are still unknown at press time.

Check back as more information will be shared as it becomes available.
 
Sounds like a great event. I've been slowly developing a taste for amari but never through something as structured as this. Alas I too live in the wrong city.
 
originally posted by Rahsaan:
Sounds like a great event. I've been slowly developing a taste for amari but never through something as structured as this. Alas I too live in the wrong city.

What is this "structure" you speak of?

Free form Fernet
 
[NEWS Release]

The Executive Steering Commitee of the Royal Order of Fernets today took the unusual step of banning wearers of detachable collars to their 2009 International Conference, entitled F*ck Limoncello. Reached for comment while vacationing on Deer Island, Fernet Society spokesperson Steven Angelica said "Throughout it's distinguished history, the Society has always been associated with fellowship and the highest standards of congeniality. We are careful each Tap Day to select members who will uphold those values. It is for this reason that the Fernets have taken this precaution. It is not so much the detachable collar itself that is at issue, as the stuffed shirt that is so often attached." Contacted at his home in the Bronx, Fernet Society Sergeant at Arms Philip "The Root" Russo was quoted as saying "Look, this is something we all look forward to. I hear there might even be an unfiltered amaro at the Grand Tasting this year. It should be great. What we don't need is some douchebag flying in from Hong Kong and ruining it for everybody."

The first 2009 meeting of the Academie Fernet will take place in New York City on Saturday, September 26th. Consult the Fernet Today, Tomorrow, and the Next website for more information (username: amaro password: 4days).

[End Release]
 
[Telemundo!]

Jose-Luis Montenegro, President for Life of Fernet del Sud, the South American arm of the Distinguished Order of Fernet today announced that, as in years past, the Order will bestow a Grand Jury Prize for Best Spanish or Portuguese Language Fernet related Television Short. Entrants will need to submit their short pieces for consideration to the Fernet del Sud offices by noon tomorrow.

Mr. Montenegro was quoted as saying "As in years past, our organization is at the forefront of recognizing merit amongst the broad and spirited category of South American Fernet advertising. Where others might see these commercials as merely sexually explicit or juvenile, we see a greater good in the broad dissemenation of these artistic works."

In a break with years past, Kayne West has not been invited to present the Award in 2009. "He's a dipshit" said Mr. Montenegro.
 
Yesterday's Amaro Fun gathering by the numbers:

Number of cool folks who were tasting amaro: 16

Number of cool, but non-drinking folks who just came to groove on the scene: 1

Number of cool folks with apparently a lot of time on their hands who came dressed up as giant artichokes: 8 (oh, alright, it was really only 3)

Number of amari passed amongst the group: 12

Number of people who compared the Stock Rosolio to some sort of liquid they might have found in a Back to the Future flux capacitor: 3

Number of distilleries in the Stock group: 20

Number of people who had heard of "The Vandergrift": 0

The number of years Nonino Amaro spends ageing in barrel: 5

Number of people who got noticeably drunk and started spouting random stories: 1 (and it wasn't me this year! yay!)

Number of people who could tell the difference between the Inga Amaro "Mio" and the Inga Amaro "My" when tasting them side by side: 16

Number who could explain that difference in what is ostensibly the same product: 0

The number of different herbs and spices in Ramazzotti amaro: 33

Number of people who asked for more Caffo "del Capo" to try: 5

Number of people who were saying things like "I could drink a whole bottle of this!": 1 (the same dude who got ramblin' drunk)

The number of hours spent tasting through amari: 1
 
originally posted by Levi Dalton:
Yesterday's Amaro Fun gathering by the numbers:

Number of cool folks who were tasting amaro: 16

Number of cool, but non-drinking folks who just came to groove on the scene: 1

Number of cool folks with apparently a lot of time on their hands who came dressed up as giant artichokes: 8 (oh, alright, it was really only 3)

Number of amari passed amongst the group: 12

Number of people who compared the Stock Rosolio to some sort of liquid they might have found in a Back to the Future flux capacitor: 3

Number of distilleries in the Stock group: 20

Number of people who had heard of "The Vandergrift": 0

The number of years Nonino Amaro spends ageing in barrel: 5

Number of people who got noticeably drunk and started spouting random stories: 1 (and it wasn't me this year! yay!)

Number of people who could tell the difference between the Inga Amaro "Mio" and the Inga Amaro "My" when tasting them side by side: 16

Number who could explain that difference in what is ostensibly the same product: 0

The number of different herbs and spices in Ramazzotti amaro: 33

Number of people who asked for more Caffo "del Capo" to try: 5

Number of people who were saying things like "I could drink a whole bottle of this!": 1 (the same dude who got ramblin' drunk)

The number of hours spent tasting through amari: 1

Sounds like a productive use
of bitter-ness.
 
originally posted by Scott Kraft:
Does it take a bitter person to make a bitter drink or to drink a bitter drink?

No.

That would be an idiotic stance to take, actually.

The question might be looked at in another way by saying, here are these (many) Italians who see this drink with this flavor to be a normal and desirable part of one's day, and then there are all these Americans who seem to see something wrong with bitter or vegetal flavors, to the point that they would even suggest that the people who enjoy such flavors are somehow flawed.
 
[Communique]

The Ordre des Hospitaliers Fernet today proclaimed to all who would know that Lurk d'Celebrites Lee Campbell and Joe Salamone would be present for the Bitter Games to held this Saturday, October 3rd in the Year 2009. His Eminence the Grand Master and Blessed Gerard Menta has extended to these two worthies invititations of Bitter Writ, and they have so accepted. Sayeth the Friar Raymond du Puy du China "let them speak and be heard amongst the Fernets, that they should not be mimes only, but convey joy and merriment to all gathered there for the purpose of sharing a cup. Their names will henceforth be counted amongst the Commanderies d'Amari." And so will many a cup be lifted this Saturday.
 
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